Reaching Out to Grasp

Yet another dream. What was I dreaming? I couldn't remember.
I was reaching out my hand, but in a dilemma whether to grasp on.
Yet another tear escaped without control.
What was I dreaming again?
Tearing silently to myself in the moment when emotions hit me.
What was I feeling then?
If I had held on, would it make a difference?
Is it too late to reach out or grasp on anymore.
Lately I kept thinking. Why do I keep having these distraughting dreams?
I've lost my ability to cry with a conscious mind.
I know it. Crying won't bring back anything.
Suppressing myself too much? Stressing out at work?
Falling sleepy easily and falling into deeper sleep more often and longer hours.
Am I escaping? Am I dying?
Searching for a cure. Although I don't know what will remedy.
I am a bird in search of the limitless sky?
Once I had a sky, I thought I could fly freely.
I met a cloud, which really fascinated me.
Followed and followed but the cloud eventually dissipated.
Chasing and searching aimlessly for the missing cloud.
Another bird flew by. Showed me a tree hole where I can perch on to watch the sky.
But I was not satisfied. I did not share the same ideal.
Watching was not contenting for me. I had to fly.
I know clouds come and go, but I'm still so fascinated by clouds.
Always changing. Always moving. Around me. Protecting me.